Applicable situations include, but are not limited to the following:
- Who gets out of bed to shut the bedroom light off at night,
- Who reprimands the cat when he's gotten into something,
- Who decides what to have for dinner,
- Who chooses what to watch on TV,
- Who takes the trash out,
- Who loads or unloads the dishwasher,
- Who cleans the catbox, etc
As is most often the case, neither one of us jumps at the opportunity to attend to the situation. Thus, a time-honored method is used to mediate the problem:
We take this very seriously.
The victor of the best-two-out-of-three round challenge gets to gloat about their success, while the loser begrudgingly attends to the situation at hand. For example, here is a run-down of last night's challenge. The loser of said challenge must get out of the warm, toasty bed and shut the bedroom light off.
Because we know each other's tactics so well, the first couple rounds end up in a tie with both of us throwing rock. I make an ill-advised move and lose the next round to scissors-beating-paper. The next round immediately following my loss I throw a change up rock-beating-scissors, tying the score 1-1.
In the third and final round, the tension in the room is palpable. We count off to deliver the final throw, and...
The Boss delivers a lethal blow of scissors-beating-paper, and lets out a primal yell of victory.
She snuggles up with the blankets, and there is no exchange of words as I throw back the covers and get out of bed. I switch off the light, and get back into bed. My side of the bed is now ice-cold.
As I lean in to kiss The Boss goodnight, I notice the smug grin on her face. I smile back at her, and kiss her gently.
"Goodnight, Mike. I love you," she said.
I shut off my bedside lamp, and the room falls into darkness. We lay there in silence, ready for sleep...
... when I shatter the silence with a bedspring-rattling fart.
The Boss groans in disgust and flaps the covers up and down to get rid of the horrid, eye-watering smell. The rush of cool air floods in, removing any warmth that might once have been.
Settling in once the smell dissipates, The Boss kicks me hard in the shin.
It is now my turn to smile smugly.
"I love you, too."