Thursday, January 8, 2009

In Which I... Well, You'll See

I know this won't come as a surprise to everyone, but I managed to accidentally hurt myself again.

What did I do this time, you ask?

Well, yesterday... I fell down a flight of stairs.

I'm not sure exactly how it happened, but then again, falling down the stairs does not require a degree in Rocket Science. I've given it some thought, though, and I've narrowed it down to two possible scenarios:
  1. I wasn't paying attention and misjudged where the stair was, or 
  2. The staircase shrunk slightly at the exact moment that I stepped down.
I'm thinking the latter of the two is the more likely situation. 

Either way, down I went, sliding down the staircase on my right ass cheek. In the process of hitting all 9 stairs before I hit the bottom, I threw my cellphone clear across the room, kicked off both of my (hard-plastic soled) slippers, and took out a couple books resting on a window sill at the bottom of the stairs. Once I hit the floor I rolled away from the stairs, and sat there for a minute or two.

A quick self-diagnosis revealed that other than a pair of bruised heels, a sore ass cheek, and an over-extended right knee, I was no worse for wear. 

We've all heard it said that you learn something new every day. Yesterday I learned that while it is much quicker to go down a flight of stairs on your ass, it is much safer to go about it the old-fashioned way... One foot at a time, and with one steady hand on the railing. 


areason2write said...

ouch - maybe you should install an elevator. But then again you can hurt your fingers pushing buttons. I hope your butt feels better soon.

Daddy Files said...

My 9-month-old son just took a tumble down the stairs too. Except know...can't walk or anything!

Cape Cod Gal said...

I will be there in an hour or two and give you a butt massage. That should help.

Is Debbie going to be there? You know I can't stand that bitch. She always hogs all the attention.

Miss Grace said...

When we were kids we used to slide down the stairs on our butts on purpose, wrapped up in a blanket. My mom was nonplussed.

Sus said...

When I was a kid, I used to purposefully fall down the stairs for dramatic effect. I got pretty good at doing it without getting hurt. It would freak the shit out of people. Haha!

Badass Geek said...

A Reason 2 Write: An elevator would be nice... But only if it came with a doorman, so I'd avoid those bruised fingers.

Daddy Files: Yeah, our coordination levels are probably about the same.

Cape Cod Gal: That sounds pretty good. I'll have the front desk save you a room key. And no, Debbie won't be there. It's just you and I.

Miss Grace: We did that too! It's more fun if you intend on doing it, as opposed to suddenly being whisked down hardwood stairs.

Sus: I would pay a lot of money to see that. Are there any home videos of that, by any chance?

splodge said...

"an over-extended right knee," and your dented dignity.

I love slapstick, but I wouldn't want to see you really hurt - bet you get some colourful bruises starting tomorrow.

Lola said...

Hey, now we both have broken asses. We're so damn cute!

Heather said...

I did this once myself, only I was kind of on my back, and hurt it pretty badly. It was the day before Halloween, and I couldn't walk so I missed trick or treating that year. =(

Jen W said...

I've been known to fall down a flight of stairs on occasion so I feel for ya.

Badass Geek said...

Splodge: I can handle the knee injury more than the dented dignity. It was in bad shape to begin with.

Lola: We are quite a pair, you and I.

Heather: This happened on my lunch break from work, so I missed about half of it from recovery time.

Jen W: Stairs are EVIL.

Tony said...

you should install a camera that way if it happens again you can youtube it.

Aunt Becky said...

I'm thinking you and I both need to install those chairlift thingies on our stairs so we can leisurely meander up the stairs without killing ourselves.

Badass Geek said...

Tony: If I had video cameras in my house, I'd have so many videos for YouTube that I'd have to quit my job just to manage them.

Aunt Becky: Those things are fun! There was one at a hotel I used to work at... I used it to carry heavy things up the stairs.

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