Monday, August 17, 2009

In Which I Meet Up With Some Mainers

Yesterday, I had the fortunate chance of meeting up with two of my blogging friends, Jenn(ifer) and Amanda. To the best of my knowledge, they are the only people in the state of Maine that publicly follow my blog. Thanks to my trusty friend Google Analytics, I know there are more of my fellow Mainers lurking around this site than just those two (de-lurk, I beg of you!), but I don't know anyone else specifically.

At any rate, this is the first time I have met up with people I've known only through blogging, and it was fun! The Boss and I met up with them at the local Starbucks here in town and chatted for a little while. I was a little worried about what exactly we'd have to talk about, seeing as I've already told all of my good stories here on this blog, but there wasn't an awkward moment at all. Even though I tend to be slightly different in person than I am online, I don't think I scared them off. If I did, they were nice enough to not run away screaming to their car and peel out of the parking lot when we parted ways.

I hope I get a chance to meet some of the other people I know through blogging sometime soon. I've got some vacation time coming up in September (hint, hint), so if anyone would be interested in meeting me and The Boss in a mutually agreeable place some Sunday next month, just send me an e-mail.

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In other news, while doing some late night shopping at Wal-Mart this past weekend, I followed The Boss as she meandered towards the book section. As I normally do while waiting for her to finish browsing through the books, I made fun of the titles of the Harlequin romance books. Some of them are just begging to be made fun of. Especially this one:


I was speechless, but it was the tag line that put me at a loss for words:
It's all about scoring - on the field and in the bedroom!
I wonder if, within the pages of this book, there is any mention of the lead male character, the muscular and shirtless wonder on the cover, stealing any bases. If so, I don't know how anyone would find that to be romantic. I mean, unless you find rape arousing, I think there are better ways to go about describing it.

Thinking about that innuendo got the ol' wheels turning. There are just so many other innuendos possible with this book theme. The game of baseball is ripe with terms that could be turned around into something sexual. Here are just a few that I could come up with:
  • Batting practice
  • Pitcher's mound
  • Center field
  • Dugout
  • Bullpen
  • Scoring position
  • Fastballs, Curve balls, Knuckle balls
  • Double or Triple play, Squeeze Play
  • Switch hitter
  • Strike zone
  • Ground ball
  • Grand Slam
So many jokes, so little time.

I was glad to see that romance authors are branching out a bit by writing stories about other types of men. It's not just about cowboys and rich, affluent bachelors and muscular, olive-skinned natives any more. Baseball players, construction workers, toll booth operators, janitors, the valet at the hotel, that guy with the ear hair at work, your urologist... They all have a chance to shine in the spotlight now.

Happy Monday, folks.

38 Comments:

abrandname said...

OH MY!!!

Let me be the first to congratulate you on your first meeting with some bloggers in Maine that are die hard readers and fans.....Just to make sure you understand...this makes us best friends now!!!! HA!

Let me also say SQUEEEEE.....WE GOT TO MEET BAG!!!! Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah....Ok, I am done...

Not only would I not run away....you and your wife are so perfectly matched and cute together it was Highlarryus to watch you too (I am going to copyright that word BTW)...

Anyone that is graced with the two of you in their presence will now know that humor knows no bounds with you and The Boss....

Thanks again for a great time talking and may the good lord bless you with finding more titles of "romance novels" with sexual innuendo....(Fastballs, Curve balls, Knuckle balls) LMAO....

Natalie said...

I laughed out loud at the title of the book.

I never got into romance novels seeing as though there are waaaaaaay better books out there. I do enjoy laughing at the over-done covers though.

My dad use to go to the bookstore and pick out romance novels for my mom purely on what the cover looked like.

Kathy Garmus said...

Are there any photos of this alleged meeting? Do any of you really exist? I want evidence, people! :-)

mysterg said...

I'm all about making those home runs!

lovelila said...

And now next time I'm at the store, I will have to look through the romance books. That tagline...wow, lmao!

Inna said...

In those romance novels the women are always up for anything.
Its so nice to meet blogger friends! :)

dsmcaron said...

Great, now I'm all distracted when I'm trying to work. ;)

Notes From the Grove said...

Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Oh, holy shit. I NEEDED to get my Monday going with a big ol' belly laugh like that. I sent that photo of the book to some friends and told them that's what I want for my birthday next year, lol. Dude. So much awesomeness. And those innuendos??? Genius!

Tammy Howard said...

Romance novels and country songs...

Seriously, I want to read the one about the tollbooth operator. I can see him standing in the toll booth, long hair blowing in the breeze stirred up by the passing traffic. Uniform shirt unbuttoned to expose his rippling muscles. Tagline: He'll take a toll - on your heart. There's gotta be an easy-pass joke in there somewhere... 'His lips said, "That will be $2.75 please" but his eyes said more. So much more."

What do you think? Do I have a future with Harlequin?

Sooooo cool that you got to meet some bloggy buds! I'm hoping to do the same one day...

JennyMac said...

Now, why would you belittle Sliding Into Home? Besides incredible literary genius in that book, the cover is pure photographic bliss.

And please don't pick this up for Boss for a holiday gift.

The Peach Tart said...

I've got to get this book as a gag gift for Mr. Peach Tart who is a huge baseball fan.

Employee No. 3699 said...

Construction workers you say?

Have I got some wood for you. (Carpenter)

I'll just need to ram my rod in your pipes. (Plumber)

I'm glad you finally got to meet some fellow bloggers!

Moonspun said...

I guess "Play Ball" has it's own connotations now! Hmmm...come to think of it my hubby loves baseball...
Oh! and Me! Me! Me! Sunday September 27th...somewhere in New Hampshire....that middle state betweeen us!

mumma boo said...

Poor Fabio - I guess his career as a bodice-ripper cover model is over. Unless he plays the tollbooth operator in Tammy's book. :) Meeting blog friends is great - it reinforces the bond you share on-line. Glad you had fun!

Lola said...

Oh, sure, set up blog dates without me. I'm so hurt!

And life is all about scoring on the field and in the bedroom. Come on, you know that ;)

Kristina said...

Do people actually read these books??? This was freaking hilarious!

Little Ms Blogger said...

I can't believe you didn't buy it for $3.67 -- how could you not with that tagline?

How fun to meet some bloggers.

x said...

I met up with some bloggers for the first time this weekend myself. Glad you had fun.

That book is awesome.

Laura said...

Oh that is funny.... some of the romance books look so cheesy. To each his own, I guess...

Aunt Juicebox said...

I admit it, I like romance novels. But they can't just be any genre, they have to be historical. And historically accurate. I grew up reading them because they were all I could get my hands on as a kid. My cousins gave me paper bags full of those thin Harlequin ones. They were all from the 70's. The other person I got books from gave me Mad magazines and Archie comics. So now I equate sex with funny. Haha.

for the love of pictures said...

Wow, that tagline is something else. I can't believe that you didn't snatch at least 3 copies of that book up for that price :)

Glad you had fun on you blog meetup :)

Mrs Soup said...

I love romance novels. They are so hilarious!!! There is also something so lovely and predictable about them.

Jenn(ifer) said...

Thank you for meeting up with us yesterday. It was really great meeting you and The Boss.

Good times!

Now I know why you giggled when I mentioned "balls deep". You're so sly!

Lana said...

ooh ooh, 'perfect game'!!

meeting other bloggers sounds like fun and an anxiety attack at the same time. your positive experience might have to serve as my point of reference :)

Samsmama said...

You met up with other bloggers and didn't post pictures? Bah! I love the idea of meeting others but I'd probably clam up and they'd find me lame. Too much pressure. Besides, to my knowledge noone else in my state blogs.

Sandy said...

Wowee, you hit the comment jackpot here, dude. I am a Mainer one generation removed.....and I wear that badge proudly!

Any time you and the Boss want to venture south to the Ocean State, I'll be happy to host a blogger event.

Cape Cod Gal said...

'Fess up! You bought it, didn't you!

Aunt Becky said...

*cue porno music*

alntv said...

Huh. I'm thinking baseball would be SOOOOO much more interesting if the it were anything like this! I can't imagine the amount of cougars or MILFS that would show up to a game! Awesome...

Petrop the Awesome said...

Mainer bloggers unite! Now, lets go to Hannaferds for some celebratory Shipyards.

Badass Geek said...

A Brand Name: We do make a good pair, The Boss and I, don't we?

Natalie: The covers often are pretty hilarious.

Kathy Garmus: There were no photos, no. I don't think any of us particularly wanted our pictures taken.

Myster G: Totally.

Love Lila: Please do. You'll be amused.

Inna: Aren't they?

DSMCaron: I do what I can. =)

NFTG: When you get the book, let me know how it is, and if they use any baseball terms like I did.

Tammy Howard: I think that book would sell. There are some people out there with some weird fetishes.

Jenny Mac: Hey, sliding into home is one of the best things to do around here.

The Peach Tart: I'm sure he'd enjoy this, then.

Employee No 3699: Electrician: I'll get you all wired up.

Moonspun: I'm pretty sure September 27th works for me. I'll get back to you.

Mumma Boo: Fabio's career was doomed to be short-lived. It was the hair.

Lola: Hey, you're invited to the next meet up!

Kristina: They must have readers. Otherwise I don't think they'd still publish them.

Little Ms Blogger: I was a little scared of the tagline, to be honest.

X: Yeah? Have you read it?

Laura: I guess some people like cheese.

Aunt Juicebox: Hey, sex can be funny sometimes.

FTLOP: I don't know if I have enough pride to spare to buy that book.

Mrs Soup: I can only imagine their predictability.

Jenn(ifer): It was fun! We'll have to get together again soon.

Lana: Since they already had read my blog, I knew I had nothing to be embarrassed or shy about. It was fun. Give it a try.

Sams Mama: Just go to your local coffee shop and start talking to people about your blog.

Sandy: Being from Maine sure is something to be proud of... Most of the time. =)

Cape Cod Gal: Nope! I swear!

Aunt Becky: Oh, yeah.

Alntv: Baseball and sex... America's pastime.

Petrop: Amen.

Mwa said...

Don't suppose you're taking your holiday in Belgium?

daria said...

I wish I lived in Maine, sometimes, but it is not me. I even had a dream about living in Maine the other day; how random! I love the nature out there, but I bet I'd miss mountains... not sure.

Coach J said...

You are SO my favorite new blog find. I love to laugh inappropriately at work. Thanks for that.

Ms. Case said...

Well that's just fantastic that you met up with some blogger friends. I think more people should do it!

TechnoBabe said...

You are the second blogger in a week I read who met local bloggers. Glad it was so much fun for you and The Boss. This is only my second time on your blog and I already know who the Boss is!!

Captain Dumbass said...

You're lucky to be able to meet fellow bloggers. I've never met one, unless you count my sister and mother. Bloggers in Maine though? I've read too many Stephen King books.

That damn book has me thinking about all the possible sports related themes... gah!

Badass Geek said...

Mwa: Sadly, no.

Daria: There are plenty of mountains in Maine. Plenty.

Coach J: Stick around, then. There is plenty more where that came from.

Ms Case: I agree!

Technobabe: You're a fast learner. =)

Captain Dumbass: Like a quarterback sneak, perhaps? How about the flea flicker?

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