Wednesday, October 13, 2010

In Which I Am a Bit Twisted

My grandmother is moving out of the home that she has lived in for almost fifty years and into an apartment complex geared towards those of advanced age. This is the first time she has lived in an apartment since before my father was born, but it's the right time for her to do it. Not only does it reduce the financial strain on her and eliminate the stress of homeownership, it takes away all of the responsibility from my father (and more recently myself) from having to make sure her driveway is clear in the winter and that her lawn is kept up with in the summer. She's in her early seventies, and it was time for her to scale back.

We started at the first of the year with some serious renovations in her house to get it ready to be put up for sale. The family got together and put a few month's worth of weekends and a couple thousand dollars in paint, drywall, light fixtures, window treatments, you name it, and when all was said in done, the house looked good. Better than it looked in decades. All the hard work payed off, because the house sold after just seven weeks on the market. 

Why am I telling you all of this? Well, yesterday my dad and I finished moving her into her new apartment. As I said, it's a building for the older folks. It's not a retirement home as there aren't any nurses, but it's definitely a partially government-funded facility. It's about as drab as you would think, functional and far from aesthetically pleasing. It's right across the street from the elementary school that I went to as a kid, and taped to just about every door that I walked past while lugging boxes and lamps and chairs into her unit had something that the kids had made in school. You know, the construction paper/glue/glitter/sticker creations that often adorn refrigerators.

One of them caught my eye. I'm sure that the kid who made it was innocent and didn't have the slightest clue what he/she was doing, which makes the following all the more awesome:

Aww, how cute. A little kitten looking hungrily over a fishbowl, giving everyone the finger.

I'm probably more than just a little twisted to have noticed this and interpreted it in the way that I did, but that's who I am. After seeing this one, I scouted out the rest of the doors to the other apartments down the hall. None of the others had little kittens flipping the bird other than this one, which is why I think this might was A: obviously overlooked by the teacher, and B: intentional.

Here's what all of the others looked like:

Still not a natural position for the digits on a cat's paw, but who am I to judge? I suppose it's better than giving everyone who walks by a cheery "Fuck You!". 

While it's not likely, the twisted part of me hopes there's this little mastermind in kindergarten or first grade across the street who knew full well what they were doing when they arranged that kitten's fingers that way. It kind of makes me excited to see what kind of creations this kid will come up with for the upcoming holidays. A Jack-O-Lantern eating a trick-or-treater? A stabbed and bloody turkey on a platter for Thanksgiving? A picture of Mrs. Claus giving Santa a lap dance up at the North Pole? 

I can't wait to find out.


Scuba Nurse said...

bahaha! kids are awesome, and you are awesome for noticing their awesomeness.

The Shanner of Attention said...

at least the kitty is happy about flipping the bird? hahahaha.

JenS said...

Buaahhaaahaaa. That is perfect!

Jennifer said...

Hahaha part of me thinks the kid knew what he was doing.
It's like when our geometry class had a project freshman year where we had to take all these formulas and geometrical shapes and build a house. One guy made a building and named it "Pussy's Playhouse." Granted, we were all 15/16 years old so it was definitely more intentional, but regardless, the teacher didn't even notice.

I think the kid picked it up from somewhere and decided to add it to the kitten. Even if he/she didn't, like you said, they're a genius. Hahaha.

Thanks for sharing that.

Daniel said...

That is fantastic.

Chuck said...

Your spacial recognition faculties are on high alert my friend.

Jasmine said...

That's great!

kristina said...

The kid is innocent, but gramma/grampa noticed and hung it on their door to "welcome" their neighbours, I'm sure!

Shannon Green said...

I'm more concerned for that poor fish in the middle of the bowl.

I'm no art interpreter but it's obvious to me that the bowl represents some kind of prison and that fish in the middle is the new guy on the cell block who is about to face the welcome wagon...from behind.

Just sayin'.

Didactic Pirate said...

Yup, you're totally right. That first kitten looks fuckin' surly. He's definitely flipping the double bird.

Badass Geek said...

Scuba Nurse: Awesome indeed!

The Shanner of Attention: Very true.

JenS: Isn't it?

Jennifer: No problemo.

Daniel: It sure is.

Chuck: Always.

Jasmine: I kind of want it for my door.

Kristina: That's highly likely.

Shannon Green: Yikes.

Didactic Pirate: Heck, yeah.

Deidra said...

North Pole dancing? lol

Writer Ninja said...

Somebody has to notice creative genius…

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