Wednesday, December 8, 2010

In Which I Rhyme

For some, this is the season in which
we should all be jolly,
and deck all of our halls with
obligatory boughs of holly.

For others it is the time
to simply drive around
and see the decorations
others have strung up over town.

Some displays are tasteful,
with twinkling lights serene.
Others have gone overboard,
creating a yuletide murder scene.

There's a poor inflatable Rudolph,
he's bleeding air over by the stairs,
and all of the other reindeer look
like they might have been attacked by bears.

Electric candy canes light up
a short makeshift runway,
but with no one on the ground to land it,
there's not much left of the sleigh.

There's a melted plastic Santa Claus
who looks like he's high on weed.
Across the lawn there is a manger that,
for repair, there is a great need.

The Nativity looks like a porno set,
with Mary and Joseph doing things obscene
while the three Wise Men look on, greedy-eyed.
They'll need more than holy water to get clean.

And underneath it all,
if you look at it really up close,
you'll see remnants of last Halloween
complete with witches, spiderwebs, and ghosts.

As for me, I stick to the basics:
a few simple stockings and a tree.
But when Christmas is done, I'll be the one
burning it in my backyard with glee.


How's this for Christmas spirit?


ChopperPapa said...

Impressive, you're a poet and didn't know it.

And if anyone's wondering, I'm not gay even though I did put that in writing.

Kev D. said...

The Nativity looks like a porno set?
I guess I haven't seen that version yet.
If you insist on burning the tree in the yard,
be sure to also burn each christmas card.

Have a holly jolly whatever.

Chuck said...

Bravo dude, bravo. Well written...I like the burning the tree in the backyard part.

Didactic Pirate said...

You had me at yuletide murder scene.

Moonspun said...

Yea, I love yuletide murder scene, too! And I wonder how Joseph gets it up if he is plastic?

Badass Geek said...

ChopperPapa: No homo, right?

Kev D: Suave.

Chuck: Me, too. I think I'm going to do that this year.

Didactic Pirate: You big softie.

Moonspun: Magic. =)

Employee No. 3699 said...

Yuletide murder scene? Apparently you've seen my neighbor's house.

Post a Comment