Monday, September 12, 2011

In Which I'd Be Horrified

If I was a young, impressionable kid, and I saw this at the store, I'd be horrified:




Once I got over the excitement of seeing one of the characters I've seen on TV in something tangible, I'd start to realize what was awfully wrong about it. First of all, she's obviously been in a tragic steamroller accident, because she's very, very flat. I would then imagine that someone tried to save her from the steamroller but only succeeded in stretching her arms out like Stretch Armstrong and giving her gargantuan hands (equipped with cupholders). Thirdly, clearly something bad happened with her legs, too, as they're pretty short. Well, I guess they only look short because of her ginormous arms and torso. 

This is a prime example of going to far for the sake of product tie-ins. When I was a kid, my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle underwear was enough for me.

Happy Monday, folks.

11 Comments:

Hamlet's Mistress said...

Those hands. They will haunt me, I fear.

Amy - Hamlet's Mistress

Courtney said...

Ditto about the hands. They look like they are very capable of strangling the young child who is unfortunate enough to be sitting on top of her.

kristina said...

That is just freaky - almost worse than clowns...

Andrea said...

Definite nightmares....*shudders*

Marty said...

I despise Dora. We keep getting hand-me-downs with things like sweatshirts and poorly written preschool literature featuring her ridiculous head and horrific antics. Being the protective mother that I am, I refuse to let any of it touch my children, so now there is a large bag of Dora-themed crap in the back of my closet. I'm pretty sure a Chukie-esk horror movie scene is in the making at this point.

Jasmine said...

Weird.

Poke The Rock said...

and then you are supposed to sit on her? that's just weird!!!

makingmonkeysoup.com said...

Only at Walmart.

Nyx said...

OH CHRIST KILL IT.

confidence with women said...

Oh my! How did Dora get there?

Badass Geek said...

Hamlet's Mistress: Me, as well.

Courtney: They probably would, too.

Kristina: Almost.

Andrea: You're welcome!

Marty: BURN IT.

Jasmine: Indeed.

Poke The Rock: Right? What exactly is that teaching our kids?

MakingMonkeySoup: You've got that right.

Nyx: I was seriously tempted to.

Confidence With Women: She obviously upset some TV executive.

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